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Monday, June 23, 2014

Download Memories (Lang Leav), by Lang Leav

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Memories (Lang Leav), by Lang Leav

Review

"Frank poems about love, sex, heartache and betrayal."--The New York Times"Leav is one of a new generation of bestselling poets catapulted to celebrity and coveted book deals." --The Guardian"Poetry rarely brings in big bucks but Australian writer Lang Leav is changing the game." --Straits Times "Lang Leav tackles nothing less than love and all its messy, glorious complexities." --Elle Magazine"Upon reading, you would think her pieces are not as much made of words than they are of feelings - a skill at expression not a lot of contemporary poets could grasp." --Momumento

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About the Author

Lang Leav is an international best-selling author and social media sensation. She is the winner of a Qantas Spirit of Youth Award and coveted Churchill Fellowship. Her books continue to top bestseller charts in bookstores worldwide and Lullabies won the Goodreads Choice award for Poetry. Lang has been featured in various publications including The Sydney Morning Herald, The Straits Times, The Guardian and The New York Times. She currently resides in New Zealand with her partner and fellow author Michael Faudet. 

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Product details

Series: Lang Leav (Book 3)

Hardcover: 256 pages

Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing (October 6, 2015)

Language: English

ISBN-10: 9781449472399

ISBN-13: 978-1449472399

ASIN: 1449472397

Product Dimensions:

5.3 x 1 x 8.3 inches

Shipping Weight: 1.6 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)

Average Customer Review:

4.5 out of 5 stars

78 customer reviews

Amazon Best Sellers Rank:

#327,436 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

I absolutely love Lang Leav but Im disappointed that I practically bought the first two books all over again. And there were only a few new pieces. I wouldn't reccomend this for those of you that have the first two. But this is a good book to buy if you want a summary of the first two. So it is kinda two for one.

Memories by Lang Leav was a wonderful read. She really does pour her soul into her writing. Her words are full of love, pain, and sorrow and I could feel it in each word. I think I read this book in a week. With the turn of each page was a new experience, a new emotion to feel. I was not disappointed. She is an extraordinary poet.

These short poems are eloquently written, yet simple. Love, loss, and memories of the past. Some resonate with you, some don't. However, all will move you. Definitely worth the read.

Excited that this just came in the mail. I love lang leav and buying her book for a cheap price is a winner for me. I givery it a 4 star because the corners are a bit damage and as well a black mark on the pages. I like my books being in good condition. Overall very cheap for its original price. Totally recommend

Lang Leav is one of the most amazing authors/poets of today. Her words are seamless, enchanting and brilliant. I own all of her books and consider that fact an honor. You must purchase this, you will never go wrong with this poet!

One of my fiances favorite authors. The poems of love fit us so well. The tales of heartache, which seem more numerous, bring about sadness for those who lost love, or are still searching.

Beautiful book, just like all of the others. Would strongly recommend for anyone who is in to poetry or wants to explore it.

I do love Lang Leav but I also think I was a little disappointed after reading this because everyone hyped her writing up so much.

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Thursday, June 5, 2014

Ebook Oncology Esthetics: A Practitioner's Guide Revised & ExpandedBy Morag Currin

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Oncology Esthetics: A Practitioner's Guide Revised & ExpandedBy Morag Currin


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Oncology Esthetics: A Practitioner's Guide Revised & ExpandedBy Morag Currin

FULL COLOR IMAGES! Oncology Esthetics: A Practitioners Guide Revised & Expanded Edition is an essential resource for any esthetician who wants to improve his/her knowledge on the science of caring for clients with cancer or who are undergoing cancer treatment. Morag Currin offers an enhanced edition following the success of the original Oncology Esthetics with a Revised and Expanded edition which provides a more in-depth look at personalized treatments for clients with oncology-related skin issues.

As a reference and guide to the ever expanding study of Oncology Esthetics, educated estheticians can become experts in the value of nurturing touch, skin reactions that come as a result of cancer treatment, esthetic oncology massage and the use of appropriate skin care.

This edition provides more information on biological therapies and skin side effects as well as background knowledge of different types of cancer, stages and origins. Each therapy chapter covers the treatments, reactions, side effects, and the role the esthetician plays in helping to alleviate symptoms. Personal stories are also provided in the book to prove the need base for personalized esthetics and spa treatments for oncology-related skin issues. Currin emulates her philosophy that The key to success is providing each client with their own, individual protocol that pertains to their specific condition.

New Expanded topics in this edition include:

Recognizing skin abnormalities and understanding the skin s reaction to cancer therapies
Oncology drug reactions on the skin from certain ingredients in skin care products
Ethnic skins and how certain cancers effect different skin types
How certain spa treatments can be modified for clients with cancer or who are undergoing treatment
Understanding the lymphatic system while performing oncology massage therapy during treatment and recovery
Utilizing the correct skin care products during treatment and recovery and why certain ingredients are used in oncology skin treatment

This book is useful for anyone with the need to know about cancer in language that is uncomplicated, easy-to-follow and organized.

  • Sales Rank: #1586083 in Books
  • Published on: 2014-09-25
  • Binding: Paperback
  • 649 pages

Review
As doctors, massage therapists and aesthetician relationships continue to develop in the medical industry, the importance of continuing education is an absolute necessity and there are very few books in the industry that fill this gap. Morag Currin has done a better than outstanding job of combining knowledge of how to care for cancer patients beyond medical procedures. As care for cancer patients continues to be a growing industry, Oncology Esthetics defines every step of cancer treatments from the differing surgeries to an entire chapter on oncology drugs administered and how health professionals, massage therapists and aestheticians can give treatments to comfort a patient while being cognizant of any reactions that may occur. Every chapter offers well researched knowledge that can benefit both cancer patients and clients that may be visiting a spa as well. She also discusses in depth the pros and cons of many of today's promoted beauty procedures and how they will actually effect the skin. To often in the professional beauty industry, products are used on men and women without proper study of the effects that may occur when not used properly. Currin uses her South African background where beauty therapies require intense training along with several advanced degrees and certifications she has received to put together a book that is an absolute must to any professional wanting to deal with cancer patients in a manner that is both professional and ethical. --Wendy Fitos, Licensed Esthetician (Ohio and Pennsylvania), volunteer with cancer patients through the Look Good Feel Better Program

Oncology Esthetics: A Practitioner's Guide by Morag Currin is a fantastic resource, and an indispensable tool for anyone who would like to expand their knowledge of cancer with regard to skin care and stature in the medical esthetic Industry. This book targets topics that have never been covered before. Written by one of the industry's leading experts in skin care, you can consider each chapter practical, clear and concise, and value it as an extremely comprehensive and educational book that will give any reader a wealth of knowledge. --Lori Johnson Licensed Esthetician and Professional Postgraduate Skin Care Trainer, Phoenix, Arizona

About the Author
Morag Currin, LE, CLMT, has more than 16 years of spa industry experience, including training and management, and has pioneered an oncology esthetics certification program for estheticians, by which they learn to incorporate massage techniques for people undergoing cancer therapies, to screen for cancerous skin lesions and to bring cancer survivors skin back into balance. Currin developed TecNiche, a skin care line for health-challenged skin, and is the author of two textbooks on oncology esthetics, including the original Oncology Esthetics: A Practitioner s Guide (Alluredbooks, 2009) and Health Challenged Skin.

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Friday, May 30, 2014

Download Teen Witch: Wicca for a New Generation

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  • Published on: 1600
  • Binding: Paperback

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Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Free Ebook Intelligent LeadershipBy Alan Hooper, John Potter

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Intelligent LeadershipBy Alan Hooper, John Potter


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The need for high-quality leadership in all areas of business and organizational activity has never been greater. A myriad of inter-linked factors mean that styles of leadership that were appropriate in the past are now no longer working. (These factors include new technologies, more questioning attitudes to authority, the arrival of the "virtual organization" with its network of contributors, and the unprecedently high expectations of customers and employees.)In Intelligent Leadership, Alan Hooper and John Potter look at how changes affect people in businesses and organizations, including through specific case studies - and propose practical ways for leaders to provide effective leadership in a quickly changing and confusing work environment. The focus is on winning hearts and minds, on leadership as an emotional and psychological commitment to the people being led, and on the idea of emotional intelligence.

  • Sales Rank: #2605255 in eBooks
  • Published on: 2011-02-28
  • Released on: 2011-02-28
  • Format: Kindle eBook

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Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Download Ebook Programming and Problem Solving with Delphi

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Programming and Problem Solving with Delphi

From the Back Cover

@CATEGORY = Programming Languages (CC00)@TITLE = Programming and Problem Solving with Delphi@AUTHOR = Mitchell C. Kerman Programming and Problem Solving with Delphi teaches beginners how to program using Delphi, and assumes no prior programming experience. Throughout, it emphasizes sound problem solving and programming skills, and is designed with numerous screen shots to demonstrate this visual language. The book includes a CD-ROM of Delphi 5 so readers have access to the latest features of the language. Delphi is an object Pascal-based language that is widely used in the corporate sector. As a point of comparison, Delphi is a similar language to Visual Basic yet is more robust. This book covers Windows-based programming concepts such as OLE, DDE and ActiveX components. It provides a full chapter on debugging, and includes numerous appendices on the user interface, debugging, Delphi error codes, and more, also making this an excellent language reference. This is the first book designed to teach Delphi programming to those without any programming experience.@ISBN = 0-201-70844-2@MAINCAT = Programming Languages@DATALINE1 = 2002, 560 pages, 8 3/8 x 10 7/8@DATALINE2 = Paper, $45.75k

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Product details

Paperback: 650 pages

Publisher: Addison Wesley (July 7, 2001)

Language: English

ISBN-10: 0201708442

ISBN-13: 978-0201708448

Product Dimensions:

7.4 x 1.4 x 9 inches

Shipping Weight: 2.3 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)

Average Customer Review:

4.6 out of 5 stars

6 customer reviews

Amazon Best Sellers Rank:

#4,049,055 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Take the five stars in context of Delphi having no university textbooks published in the last twenty years or so. This book is well written and surprisingly relevant for current programmers taking up Delphi or Lazarus (like I am). Delphi code is very stable, unlike C++ or Python so I am having no problems using this book with RAD studio XE2 and Lazarus. You have to use the Lazarus feature to convert Delphi projects, of course. For one dollar, this book is the best deal on a computer book I have ever made. You have to roll with the old screenshots, but you have to expect some changes like that. Think of this book as mainly for the language and not the IDE and then it works just fine.

This is a fantastic book for newcomers to Delphi, but with a shortcoming for some potential readers:1. Kerman teaches not only Object Pascal/Delphi in a clear, concise progression, but also the basics in efficient design while solving real world implementation problems.2. Object Oriented Programming is integrated by the very nature of using Delphi objects, and later in the book, Kerman introduces additional Object Oriented Programming (OOP) fundamentals.3. Unlike nearly every other Delphi text I've read aimed at Delphi newcomers, this book ensures the reader learns, understands, and integrates efficient problem solving along the way.4. Finally, Kerman includes excellent exercises and quizzes to verify and challenge your learning in each chapter.5. My only negative critique (and the reason I only give the book four stars) is that the book does not include solutions to the end-of-chapter exercises and quizzes. (The solutions are located online for instructors only, which makes it difficult if you are teaching yourself). You also will not have access to the book's errata unless you complete online student registration with Addison/Wesley/Pearson Tech/(etc.). The reason this book is so expensive is because it's been adopted as a teaching text, and all textbooks are expensive because they can be. Sad but true.Having said that, I do not believe you'll find a better introduction to Delphi/Object Pascal anywhere.

I bought this book for my husband. Computers are his department in our house. He likes learning new things about computers. He tries many different operating systems, tons of different software, and uses multiple programming formats. This book was a good source for information for him.

This is a great book. It is really in depth and gave me everything I needed to know about Delphi.

Even though the book is a bit old (Explaining Delphi 5) but the principles of Delphi or Pascal programming are the strongest pillars of this book.In chapter 1: Kerman takes the learner into an introduction to computer science.Chapter 2: Delphi Development Environment (Delphi 5 IDE).Chapter 3: Planning your program (theories, flowchat, pseudocode).Chapter 4: Elements of Programming (variables, arithmetic operators ,,,)Chapter 5: Decision structures. (if then, booleans)Chapter 6: Repetition Structures. (loops)Chapter 7: Text Files.Chapter 8: Structured programming (subprograms, procedures and functions, passing parameters).Chapter 9: Error-Proofing and Debugging.Chapter 10: Data structures. (Arrays, static arrays, pointers ,,,)Chapter 11: Binary Files.Chapter 12: Sorting and searching.Chapter 13: Databases.Chapter 14: Recursion.Chapter 15: Object-Oriented Programming.Chapter 16: Additional delphi components.Chapter 17: Advanced delphi programming.Appendices:A. computer arithmetic and number systems.B. ASCII (ANSI) Character values.C. Object Pascal Programming standards.D. Customizing Delphi IDE (version 5)E. Distributing Delphi Programs.F. Object Pascal reserved words.G. Migrating from visual basic to Delphi << one of the book's top subjects.So, yeah I just disliked how the author didn't pay enough attention to functions in chapter 8, they are not well explained. But it's alright i can find plenty of resources on the internet about that. In addition, the CD that contains the solutions is not available and it is accessible to instructors only.Other than that, this book is a blessing.Finally, it depends from a learner to learner. Some want the up-to-date material explaining Delphi XE2 for example. This book is not for you, but If you are a newbie to delphi, then you have to read this book and another one which is more simple (Essential Pascal by Marco Cantu).

This book [was expensive to me] because it is a textbook, and as we all know, there's no getting around the price of a textbook. I'm not currently attending class, but purchased this book anyway. I found it extremely well laid out, very descriptive, and informative. I went from knowing very little about Delphi, to knowing quite a bit. This book has all the little bits of information the less formal books leave out. A great book! If I had one complaint, it was of the lack of attention to some of the higher programming skills, chapters like DDE were very short indeed, but gave you enough to know what they did. This is a beginners book, make no mistake. If you're just learning Delphi, it's great. I believe this was made with Delphi 5, but there are so few differences, you'll never notice.

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Sunday, April 6, 2014

Download PDF The Hacker Playbook 2: Practical Guide To Penetration Testing, by Peter Kim

Download PDF The Hacker Playbook 2: Practical Guide To Penetration Testing, by Peter Kim

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The Hacker Playbook 2: Practical Guide To Penetration Testing, by Peter Kim

The Hacker Playbook 2: Practical Guide To Penetration Testing, by Peter Kim


The Hacker Playbook 2: Practical Guide To Penetration Testing, by Peter Kim


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The Hacker Playbook 2: Practical Guide To Penetration Testing, by Peter Kim

About the Author

Peter Kim is the CEO/President of Secure Planet, LLC, a global penetration testing company. He has worked in the security field for almost ten years, and has spent the past seven as a penetration tester. His research has been featured on Wired.com, CNN.com, and various other outlets. Kim has a wide variety of certifications from Sec+, GCIH, GCWN, GWAPT, GXPN, and GMOB. He spent several years teaching penetration testing and network security at Howard Community College in Maryland, and he is the founder of LETHAL, a local security hackerspace in Santa Monica, California. You can find out more information about LETHAL at meetup.com/LETHAL, or visit Kim's blog at Secure Planet: SecurePla.net.

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Product details

Series: The Hacker Playbook

Paperback: 358 pages

Publisher: CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform (June 20, 2015)

Language: English

ISBN-10: 1512214566

ISBN-13: 978-1512214567

Product Dimensions:

7 x 0.8 x 10 inches

Shipping Weight: 1.4 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)

Average Customer Review:

4.6 out of 5 stars

138 customer reviews

Amazon Best Sellers Rank:

#49,859 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

This book is not for the absolute beginner, you need to already know about the process of hacking and the UNIX/Linux OS. It is not structured very well for a beginner (or like a textbook, of self-help book). You need to already know about the software that is referenced in the book, there is no foundational explanation of using it (the software). There is no overview or instruction of the Hacking process, it jumps right into it (assuming you already know the process you need to follow).

Initially started reading the 3rd book (playbook 3) in this series and quickly found him referring to things discussed in this book ( playbook 2) so I decided to read this book first before getting too deep into playbook 3. This is a good read for people wanting to get into hacking/pen testing. This will give you a good baseline to start with if you are just getting started in the field.

I gave to my son this book because he will study in the university informatics with option in cybersecurity. It has a good approach and simple explanations to use with Kali Linux and It got the interest of my son.I think that it has a good written with compact explanations for security IT terms and if you do a lab with equipments in a small LAN this will be a good book for everyone that feels passion for cybersecurity. Only a bad situation is the paper that it is similar to a copy in low resolution but I think this one is about the low price. The author has good approach for a young student.

Great book, but not for beginners.

Is a nice book, it covers lots of programs you can use pre-installed inside Kali already, and some separate github programs as well; describes information of each program very good in one or 2 pages. Pretty much the book helps me discover more tools I didn't know existed for pen testing. A nice discount for the next edition would be amazing though.

Not as much "useful" information as the first book, but still a good read!

I had to read that book for school and it was okay. Nothing unique, lots of list of software without much deep details.

Great book for people that are just starting. I have learned a lot with this book.

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The Hacker Playbook 2: Practical Guide To Penetration Testing, by Peter Kim PDF
The Hacker Playbook 2: Practical Guide To Penetration Testing, by Peter Kim PDF

Friday, March 28, 2014

Free Download Clay Water Brick: Finding Inspiration from Entrepreneurs Who Do the Most with the LeastBy Jessica Jackley

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Clay Water Brick: Finding Inspiration from Entrepreneurs Who Do the Most with the LeastBy Jessica Jackley

Clay Water Brick: Finding Inspiration from Entrepreneurs Who Do the Most with the LeastBy Jessica Jackley


Clay Water Brick: Finding Inspiration from Entrepreneurs Who Do the Most with the LeastBy Jessica Jackley


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Clay Water Brick: Finding Inspiration from Entrepreneurs Who Do the Most with the LeastBy Jessica Jackley

In the tradition of Kabul Beauty School and Start Something That Matters comes an inspiring story of social entrepreneurship from the co-founder of Kiva, the first online microlending platform for the working poor. Featuring lessons learned from successful businesses in the world’s poorest countries, Jessica Jackley’s Clay Water Brick will motivate readers to more deeply appreciate the incredible entrepreneurial potential that exists in every human being on this planet—especially themselves.“The heart of entrepreneurship is never about what we have. It’s about what we do.”   Meet Patrick, who had next to nothing and started a thriving business using just the ground beneath his feet . . .   Blessing, who built her shop right in the middle of the road, refusing to take the chance that her customers might pass her by . . .   Constance, who cornered the banana market in her African village with her big personality and sense of mission.  Patrick, Blessing, Constance, and many others are among the poorest of the world’s poor. And yet they each had crucial lessons to teach Jessica Jackley—lessons about resilience, creativity, perseverance, and, above all, entrepreneurship.   For as long as she could remember, Jackley, the co-founder of the revolutionary microlending site Kiva, had a singular and urgent ambition: to help alleviate global poverty. While in her twenties, she set off for Africa to finally meet the people she had long dreamed of helping. The insights of those she met changed her understanding. Today she believes that many of the most inspiring entrepreneurs in the world are not focused on high-tech ventures or making a lot of money; instead, they wake up every day and build better lives for themselves, their families, and their communities, regardless of the things they lack or the obstacles they encounter. As Jackley puts it, “The greatest entrepreneurs succeed not because of what they possess but because of what they are determined to do.”   In Clay Water Brick, Jackley challenges readers to embrace entrepreneurship as a powerful force for change in the world. She shares her own story of founding Kiva with little more than a laptop and a dream, and the stories and the lessons she has learned from those across the globe who are doing the most with the least.   Praise for Clay Water Brick   “Jessica Jackley didn’t wait for permission to change the world—she just did it. It turns out that you can too.”—Seth Godin, author of What to Do When It’s Your Turn  “Fascinating . . . gripping . . . bursting with lessons . . . Jessica Jackley has written a remarkable book . . . so thoroughly well meaning and engagingly put it is too magnetic to put down.”—Financial Times“Clay Water Brick is a tremendously inspiring read. Jessica Jackley, the virtuoso co-founder of the revolutionary microlending platform Kiva, shares uplifting stories and compelling lessons on entrepreneurship, resilience, and character.”—Adam Grant, author of Give and Take   “A blueprint for anyone who wants to make the world a better place and find fulfillment in the process, no matter how scarce their resources or how steep the challenge.”—Arianna Huffington“This book is inspirational. And honest and practical. . . . Well written, thoughtful: a selfless account of how to succeed by doing right and following your heart.”—Booklist

  • Amazon Sales Rank: #601514 in Books
  • Brand: Jackley Jessica
  • Published on: 2015-06-23
  • Released on: 2015-06-23
  • Original language: English
  • Number of items: 1
  • Dimensions: 9.55" h x .92" w x 6.39" l, 1.25 pounds
  • Binding: Hardcover
  • 224 pages
Features
  • Clay Water Brick Finding Inspiration from Entrepreneurs Who Do the Most with the Least

Review “Jessica Jackley didn’t wait for permission to change the world—she just did it. It turns out that you can too.”—Seth Godin, author of What to Do When It’s Your Turn  “Fascinating . . . gripping . . . bursting with lessons . . . Jessica Jackley has written a remarkable book . . . so thoroughly well meaning and engagingly put it is too magnetic to put down.”—Financial Times“Clay Water Brick is a tremendously inspiring read. Jessica Jackley, the virtuoso co-founder of the revolutionary microlending platform Kiva, shares uplifting stories and compelling lessons on entrepreneurship, resilience, and character.”—Adam Grant, author of Give and Take   “With only a dream and a lot of determination, Jessica Jackley founded Kiva, an organization that has empowered millions of people around the world. Clay Water Brick is the inspiring story of her own far-flung journeys as an entrepreneur, but it’s also a blueprint for anyone who wants to make the world a better place and find fulfillment in the process, no matter how scarce their resources or how steep the challenge.”—Arianna Huffington  “This book is inspirational. And honest and practical. . . . Well written, thoughtful: a selfless account of how to succeed by doing right and following your heart.”—Booklist“Inspiring and insightful, Clay Water Brick is a book you simply won’t be able to put down. Jessica Jackley has created a timeless read for every aspiring entrepreneur.”—Adam Braun, author of The Promise of a Pencil   “Capital and abundant resources are not the keys to innovation, and Jessica Jackley proves it. The stories of some of the unlikely entrepreneurs she’s met around the world inspire us to see opportunity where before we saw none.”—Simon Sinek, author of Start with Why   “Jessica Jackley’s life story offers an inspirational blueprint for just about anyone who wants to live a more meaningful life—and the good news is that you can start today. Read it. Share it. Discuss it. Clay Water Brick is the guidebook you’ve been waiting for.”—Deborah Rodriguez, author of Kabul Beauty School“Clay Water Brick is a moving account of so many previously untold human stories, inviting the reader to think more universally about entrepreneurship and the role of business in driving positive change in the world. Jessica Jackley captures the spirit and the heart of the entrepreneur by sharing her own journey and shining a spotlight on a remarkable group of entrepreneurs from around the world and the perseverance that defines them. This is a powerful read for all, and whether you have an idea you want to pursue, an entrepreneur you can help support, or purely general interest, you will be inspired.”—Blake Mycoskie, TOMS founder and Chief Shoe Giver, author of Start Something That Matters

About the Author Jessica Jackley is an award-winning social entrepreneur focused on financial inclusion, the sharing economy, and social justice. She is best known as a co-founder of Kiva, the world’s first and largest P2P microlending website. She also co-founded ProFounder, a pioneering crowdfunding platform for U.S. entrepreneurs, and Kin & Co., a consultancy helping organizations support women and working families. She is an investor and advisor with Collaborative Fund, a member of the Council on Foreign Relations, and a World Economic Forum Young Global Leader. An active board member for several nonprofit organizations including Habitat for Humanity, Jackley holds an MBA from the Stanford Graduate School of Business, a certificate in Global Leadership and Public Policy from the Harvard Kennedy School, and a BA from Bucknell University. She lives in Los Angeles with her husband and three sons.

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved. Chapter 1Find the Courage to QuestionThe Poor with UsOur Sunday school teacher read, as she did every week, from the Good News Bible. She told us about Jesus: about what he said and did, about the big and small miracles, about how to live a good life. I listened intently as I sat cross-­legged on my carpet square, one of a dozen fuzzy islands floating on a sea of linoleum tiles. Behind her, a construction paper chart was taped to the wall, with the names of all the students in class, each with some number of gold stars next to the name. I stared at the stars lined up next to my name, one for every time I had done well (I’d earned my newest one for memorizing the Twenty-­third Psalm), counting them over and over again, and comparing my ranking among the other kids. I imagined the stars were my team of cheerleaders, each standing on two pointy legs with a pointy head and two pointy arms outstretched right and left. I was five and a half years old and wanted nothing more than to be good. A good daughter, a good sister, a good student, a good everything.On this particular Sunday, my teacher was talking about poverty. She explained that people living in poverty did not have even the most basic things they needed, like food or clothing or shelter. She told us that Jesus loved the poor and wanted everyone else to love them too. Reading from the Bible in a scattershot way, she jumped around from story to story. One was about a widow giving the last of her coins at church; another was about someone called a Samaritan who helped a sick man on the side of the road; another was about someone pouring perfume on Jesus’ feet. Some of the stories made sense to me. Many did not.I tried to follow along in my own Bible, a hardcover G-­rated children’s version with an oversized font and colorful illustrations. It was the biggest book I owned, and therefore felt like the most important. I flipped through it carefully, looking at the cartoon drawings, keeping an eye out for pictures of the kinds of people my Sunday school teacher was talking about: the poor. In some scenes they were pale and gaunt, down on their knees, their arms reaching up to a bright, sunny heaven for help. In others they were barefoot and filthy, with rags for clothing. They were people shouting in pain, wounded black and blue, or sick with white, leprous skin; people crying, bandages spotted with red across their eyes, chest, head, or hands; people on stretchers, green with nausea or gray with death.As I stared at the pictures, my Sunday school teacher quoted Jesus, saying, “What you do for the least of these you do for me.”Her words made me stop and look up.For a child who wanted nothing more than to do well by her parents and teachers, the idea that I could be some sort of cosmic helper was the most motivating thing I had ever heard! Helping the poor was helping God Himself. I felt I had just been given the world’s greatest homework assignment. I would get this right. I wanted more stars. Big ones.My mind raced with questions about how this was supposed to work. Where were these poor people? How exactly should I help? How did God keep track of how well I was doing? Did the poor report back up to heaven when I gave them my things—­sort of like how (according to my mom) the myriad Santas at the mall reported back to the one real Santa at the North Pole what I wanted for Christmas? Would I be docked points if I handed over only the stuff I didn’t want, like the crayons in colors I never used, or the half of my sandwich that had less peanut butter and jelly on it, and kept all my favorite things for myself? Or was every poor person actually God himself, like Jesus had been, since God could be everywhere and was, apparently, good at disguises?As the litany ran through my head, my Sunday school teacher told us something else that Jesus said, something that again stopped me cold. She said, as if it was no big deal at all, that Jesus promised, “The poor will always be with us.”My stomach knotted. I felt confused, then angry, then scared as this sunk in. Why would God make poor people stay poor forever? Couldn’t God make the world however he wanted? And what did this mean for me? Were my plans to help the poor destined to be inadequate? Was Jesus setting me up to fail?A terrifying scenario began to form in my head. I saw a long line of poor people in front of me, one after another after another, each in need of something I had. One was asking for my coat; one wanted my softest blanket. Another insisted I hand over the azure-­blue crayon I loved. Two others wanted not just half my PB and J sandwich, but all of it. Every time I gave something to one of these people, they would say “thank you,” but then they would make the long walk back to the end of the line, using up my crayon and gobbling my sandwich on the way, and then they would take their place again so they could return to me for more. Because, after all, the poor would always be with us. With me. They would never stop needing and they would never go away. They would follow me around everywhere I went, asking for something else, something more. Their poverty would be endless. No matter how much I gave, it would never be enough.Jesus said so.The Cost of a Cup of CoffeeAs I got older, I heard other stories that convinced me the problem of poverty was enormous. These stories reiterated the notion that poverty could never really be solved, not completely. They assured me that, while it was nice to try, no one could ever really help enough or fix things well enough to make a permanent difference.Over time the illustrations of the poor in my Good News Bible were replaced with the much more real and far more intense images I saw in mailings from charity organizations, or in the newspapers and magazines that came to our house: people pleading for help, their arms outstretched to the camera, alongside headlines of disaster or disease; men with fists raised in riot, alongside news of oppression or war; women fleeing from fighting and famine; children with swollen bellies lying in makeshift hospital rooms; babies like skeletons, their rib cages and collarbones just beneath a thin layer of skin, with flies perched on the edges of their sunken eyelids. Everyone, and everything around them, seemed dirty, broken, angry, empty.These images convinced me that the poor lived very far away from me. My neighborhood in the suburbs of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, seemed like a fairy tale in comparison. None of the kids I knew looked like those I saw in these photographs. Everyone around me looked healthy and well fed. I lived in a modern Norman Rockwell painting of soft front lawns and big shady trees with perennial flowers circling their trunks. The front doors of the houses on my street were swung open in the summer and decorated with holly and wreaths in the wintertime. Hopscotch chalk lines stained the sidewalks. Bicycles and scooters lay strewn across front yards. Minivans were parked neatly in driveways.I could not imagine the poor existing in the only world I knew. How could anyone go hungry when every kitchen I had ever seen had a full fridge and a crowded pantry? How could anyone be homeless when even my neighbors’ dogs had doghouses, and where even the mail had nice mailboxes to sit in? How could it be that not everyone had a warm jacket when everyone in my family had both winter clothes and summer clothes, and even different shoes for school and soccer practice and church?So when stories about poor people infiltrated my idyllic existence, they caught my attention. I tried hard to imagine those people and to process the statistics that accompanied the stories. Half of the world was living on less than $2 a day. Twenty-­two thousand children were dying each day from poverty. Nearly a billion people were unable to read a book or sign their names. These enormous, haunting numbers were impossible for my brain to fathom, so my heart took over. I felt anger, sadness, fear, guilt, even shame about my own relative wealth and privilege as a white, middle-­class American kid.Of course, this was exactly the desired effect of the well-­intentioned nonprofits vying for my attention in their marketing campaigns. They counted on their messages to make me feel something, and then they relied on my ability to translate those feelings into action: The worse I felt, the more I should want to give. Then, just when I thought I couldn’t take any more sad statistics, the nonprofit offered a way out: Donate! Give! Help!Who could say no? All I had to do was pick up the phone, dial the 1-­800 number on the screen, and I would be connected with someone who could solve these problems (via check, credit card, or money order)! If I just emptied my pockets or dug through my couch cushions for loose change, I’d find enough to extend a child’s life for one more day! If I could spare even the smallest amount—­Sally Struthers and other passionate spokespeople told me that “less than the cost of a cup of coffee” was enough—­I could be a part of their game-­changing work! For just a few dollars I could become the solution!And so I gave. I dug for lost coins. I took my weekly allowance to church and stuffed it into the velvety bag that was passed around to collect the congregation’s tithes. And I got others to give too. I hawked Dixie cups half-­full of watery Kool-­Aid from a card table on my front lawn. I sold magazine subscriptions and cookies and gigantic chocolate bars door-­to-­door. I toted my UNICEF box around the neighborhood on Halloween night. And every once in a while, my mom would take me to the local bank, which would tally the change, and then my mom would send a check and my handwritten notes to the poor kids I had seen on TV.Each time I did these things, I felt a little bit better. At least for a while.Part of me knew that giving a few dollars here and there was a cheap replacement for what I really sought. Deep down, I knew that I would never be satisfied until I could make some sort of real contact with the people I felt obligated to serve. In fact, I was becoming more and more certain that the strange cycle of giving in which I’d been participating actually made me feel more disconnected from the actual human beings I felt called to help. Instead of experiencing a real, meaningful interaction with a needy person, I was participating in a series of economic transactions with large organizations that had convinced me they knew how to fix things. I wasn’t actually allowed to hand over my PB and J sandwich. I was just funding someone else’s grocery list. It was all incredibly unsatisfying.The follow-­up letters from those nonprofits thanking me for my donations added insult to injury. I got form letters in the mail (usually addressed to my mom, who had written the check) thanking her for the donation in the first sentence and then immediately asking for more. As a caricature of personal touch, there were often ink-­jet printed signatures of people I had never heard of and had not intended to give any money to. (What was an executive director? Why wasn’t the letter signed by Jamal in Ethiopia or Vilma in Guatemala, the kids from the infomercials?) Some organizations even went so far as to make the form letters look like they had little notes scrawled in the margins, as if their donors would be fooled by a “handwriting” font. Even as a kid I knew what was happening. I was being thanked by a computer.I saved one of the most confusing, dissonant thank-­you letters I received back then. For a while it hung taped to the wall above my desk. The letter came in response to a donation I had sent to a nonprofit organization specializing in medical procedures for babies born with cleft lips and palates. Along with a standard one-­page thank-­you note expressing how valuable my support was to the organization, I received a self-­addressed envelope for an additional donation. So far, nothing new. But the envelope stood out. On it was a photograph, the face of a baby who had been born with a cleft lip, which had left a gaping hole from her mouth to her right nostril. Bafflingly, next to the picture—­after I had just been told how much the organization appreciated every penny, and how much of a difference each contribution made—­was a special offer: “Make one gift now, and we’ll never ask for another donation again.”The campaign was as offensive to me as it was resonant, revealing an intimate understanding of the love/hate relationship that can unfold between well-­intentioned donors and well-­intentioned nonprofits. On the one hand, I knew every dollar was appreciated and would make a big difference. That part felt great. On the other hand, someone in that organization guessed that after a while, making an impact through their particular program would probably lose its thrill. Another few bucks, another smile repaired. Seen one, seen them all, right? So they decided to cut to the chase. Their message told me: “Hey donor, we get it. We’re bothering you. So let’s quit while we’re ahead. Pay us off and you can go on with your life.”In a world with infinite need, with no such thing as “enough,” this organization seemed to understand that no donor could give forever.Sadly, I couldn’t disagree. I had become convinced that it was impossible to give enough, to cause enough change, to care enough. So I still gave, but I did so knowing exactly what I was doing. I wasn’t just buying the privilege to change someone else’s life with my donation. I was buying a temporary sense of relief for myself. With each transaction, even that feeling of temporary reprieve became more and more fleeting. I knew I wouldn’t be able to keep up with all of the world’s requests for my spare change. It was just like the long line of poor people I had pictured in Sunday school, following me around forever.

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